Here\u2019s how I recently experienced this. As I\u2019ve mentioned previously, I play tennis and have captained tennis teams for 5 years now. I recently decided not to captain a team this spring and play on someone else\u2019s team. Sounds innocent enough right? But if you know USTA tennis it\u2019s fun, but also competitive. Anyway, I did not let my last team members know my decision, and sure enough a few weeks later, the tennis ratings come out and the next thing that happens is my past team members are being contacted to play on these other teams and my phone starts blowing up with text messages, emails, and calls. People didn\u2019t know what was going on. It was terrible. I apologized for my mistake, but the carnage was out there because I procrastinated. There were hurt feelings and misunderstandings. It could have all been avoided had I not procrastinated and let the team know my decision. I should not have put it off. It was awful. I felt terrible! I accepted responsibility and cleaned up my mess, which could have all been avoided\u2014but I had procrastinated. This is a personal example of mine. Where has procrastination caused a problem in your life that you could have avoided?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Let\u2019s get back to our marriage topic! How is procrastination slowly destroying your marriage? Again, here is the definition of Procrastination: \u201cDelaying or postponing tasks, often despite knowing this may lead to negative consequences.\u201d What does this bring to mind about your marriage? Are you and your spouse sleeping in separate bedrooms because he snores and you haven\u2019t found a better solution? Has your daily schedule gotten so full, you\u2019re exhausted and drained and have nothing left for your spouse? Whatever your personal situation is, you know you are procrastinating about, it is your personal thing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Here\u2019s one that has a negative effect on your marriage. Did you physically stop going to church during the pandemic, you\u2019re watching it on line and now that\u2019s not even happening? You\u2019ll get back someday! Procrastination. It may not happen right away, but I have sat with too many of my friends who have gone through divorce. It\u2019s that glaring thing that we procrastinate about. We know it\u2019s there, but we keep putting it off.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Here\u2019s one that no one likes to talk about. Are you putting off having a physical relationship with your husband? This may sound harsh, but if it saves your marriage, it\u2019s worth talking about.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Where in your marriage do you know that if you did something different and quit procrastinating about this one thing, your marriage would take on a new life? I hope you are doing a heart search right now. Marriage usually doesn\u2019t fall apart over night. There is a lot of procrastinating going on!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
What I have learned about procrastination is this thing, this glaring thing you are procrastinating about in your marriage, is the very obstacle that if you choose to take it as a challenge to be truthful to yourself, to stop ignoring it and acknowledge it, it is the beginning of that thriving, passionate marriage that you desire.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Awareness and Acknowledgment<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
You know your obstacle. Awareness and acknowledgment are the 1st step. Now, take this to the Lord in prayer. Lay it at his feet. Ask for his wisdom. You have all your reasons; we are good at justifying. God knows our heart. Let go of your justification. We can all deceive ourselves.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Get out your personal journal. What has God put on your heart to do about it? Sometimes Satan has a stronghold, but if we allow God to change our hearts and stop being so prideful, and get in his word and ask for guidance, this obstacle is the very area that God can work. It is where I\u2019ve seen and experienced his miracles. It is never too late for God. The longer you procrastinate, the longer you will experience what you are experiencing right now. It is scary; it\u2019s going to take prayer and courage. But remember that he that is in us is bigger than he that is in the world (1 John 4:4). God wants to save your marriage. I believe that with all my heart. That\u2019s why I am so passionate about this subject. He has worked miracles in my marriage when I was willing to quit procrastinating thinking things would just get better on their own. They don\u2019t! You know if I\u2019m talking to you right now.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
My little story about captaining my tennis team may sound trivial, but it was tough. And I could have avoided so much had I not procrastinated. So where are you procrastinating in your marriage. What is that change you need to make? What are you putting off? Problems don\u2019t go away; they usually get bigger. Ask anyone who has gotten a divorce. It may start out small, but it usually grows over time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I am being very direct here. Sometimes we must stop lying to ourselves. What are you putting off dealing with, that if you continue down this road will have negative consequences for your marriage. Looking at this as an obstacle, that with God\u2019s guidance and your loving action, will change the course of your marriage.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
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