I am in Miami Beach for a quick vacation. My sister Lauren and I are really here to honor our elderly relatives. Aunt Marita just turned 100 and Camille, our first cousin once removed (though we always called her Aunt Camille) is 91. We have four nights here, but only three full days. I have seven pairs of shoes for this brief trip. Attempting to bring carry-on only, Lauren scaled down and brought five pairs. Between the two of us we have 12 pairs of size 9 shoes for three days.
As we observed what some might call excess, it reminded me of a book I’d hoped to write back when I was writing books: “Yes, I Could Travel with just Two Pairs of Shoes, but Why?” The subtitle was going to be: “Finding Fun in a World focused on Efficiency.” I never wrote the book as I never found an answer worthy of a book.
But, here in Miami, the whole concept came back to me.
Minimalist Mentality
I could understand the minimalist packing mentality back when I was traveling all the time, going from one airport to another and having to be standing on the stage to give a speech within hours. Carrying on luggage could have been very important. Though even then I always had shoes for every outfit—and I had more outfits than needed as I never knew which I would feel like when the getting-dressed moment would arrive.
I can understand if you are going to Europe and will be on and off trains or moving from one hotel to another, the two-pairs of shoes model might be appropriate. And those who ascribe to the plan seem mighty proud that they can pack so efficiently.
But, really, for those of us who have reached the Best-Life place and are no longer traveling for business—our trips are for pleasure, why not bring shoes for each outfit? As long as I am checking my luggage, and I have room, why not bring anything I think I need?
Feeling Good
I want to feel good when I look in the mirror—both at home and when I travel. I am going to take photos that I will share with friends and family, and post on Facebook. One of them may even make it onto my Christmas card.
I have cobalt shorts that go with a blue and white striped top. I have cantelope shorts that I wear with an embroidered shirt with cantelope, turquoise, red and green. Of course, I want cobalt shoes and cantelope shoes. I also have two different clear pairs with me—which I wear with one of the three swimsuits. Gratefully, no one will mistake me for the all-in-black road warrior. I am traveling for enjoyment and am living my best life.
It’s true, not everyone feels this way. Some are even proud of their efficient packing: “I went three weeks through Europe with just two pairs of shoes.”
If that is you, great! But if that is not you, do not a let friend or a spouse guilt you into following their minimalist model. If you have room and are physically able to manage your 50 pound suitcase, and you want multiple pairs of shoes, or more clothes than you need, go for it! You’ve earned it.
Understanding others’ Personality, gives us the grace to allow them to be who they are.
Yes, I could travel with just two pairs of shoes, but why?
Marita Littauer Tedder has spent the majority of her adult life working with women—helping them improve relationships, achieve their speaking and writing dreams, and being the best version of themselves they can possibly be. The author of 20 books, this Living Our Best Life Project is her newest effort—through which she hopes to challenge women to be fulfilled where they are.
I like the idea of pack and bring what you want. When I was about to pack to a summer trip, I found my pickings lacking. And too skimpy. So I googled and found a list of what ladies in their 60s could wear in summer. Found it on lands end website. And I went shopping. However, limiting ourselves to the 50lb weight, I didn’t bring even half of what I bought. But I’m not sure I’m going to limit what I check in next time. Have fun!
I would love to have the link to the the list you looked up on land’s end!
is this it? https://www.landsend.com/article/10-summer-basics-for-women-in-their-60s/
Packing for a retreat causes me more anxiety than actually speaking for the event. A lady burst into my hotel room without knocking. She had a burning question on her mind. I was changing clothes to leave for the airport. Without a pause, she exclaimed, “Oh My! You do have pretty underwear!” I’m glad I had packed my nice lingerie! Thanks Marita. I enjoyed your article.
I was going to put a laughing emoji because the visual of this story is really funny but OHMYGOSH!!! I’m flabbergasted that someone from your audience literally felt it was okay to walk in on you. We don’t enter without knocking within our own family! I think that might have been traumatic for me. Not that she saw me in my underware (actually that would be traumatic for someone to see me in my skivvies for sure) but being barged in on. You are awesome! And I’m glad you had your pretty under garments with you!
The more shoes the better, I am the extreme overpacker and it won’t ever change. I love having my outfits and my SHOES. And if I don’t have enough, I will buy them in a trip
Marita, reading this was fun, especially your description of the clothes you packed. It reminded me of something you said while teaching The Personalities: “Blending in is the Sanguine Personality’s worse nightmare”.
I’d say we did pretty well wearing all the clothes we brought. We wore a different bathing suit each day, plus I had three coordinating coverups. Each pair of shoes had a purpose and an outfit to go with. Our “elderlies” enjoyed our clothing and jewelry array. We were looked I er pretty closely each time they saw us.
I just asked my daughter (she is 30) how many shoes she took with her on her current trip to Italy. She will be gone an entire month. She said she took four pairs of shoes. FOUR? For an entire month? WHO raised you child! Well, maybe I’m a little jealous of her discipline skills. I think I would have taken at least 7-8 pairs. Several of them being flip-flops of assorted colors. I’d hate to flop when I should have flipped!
I laughed out loud reading this!
Sanguine’s think alike!
We’ve been married 30 years. THIRTY YEARS and he still makes a comment about how I pack too much for every trip. I love this stage of life – I just laugh and tell him “if I were a light packer I wouldn’t get to see all of your sexy muscles as you carry my luggage”.
Gratefully, my husband is an over-packer too.
I am one of the worst , always packing too much plus shopping everywhere I go. I alway take an extra half empty suitcase for that reason. I traveled so much when I worked that our company pilot named my suitcase “Big Bertha”. I, like you, always wanted to have a different pair of shoes for every outfit or occasion. My husband is used to it by now. Marita, I loved your blog!
Marita you’re a hoot. What fun you are. Shoes are a must; but BATHING SUITS??! I haven’t worn one since I was 19!
Well, we were in Miami Beach!
Shoes provide us both form (i.e. make us smile when we love their look) and function (like a comfortable pair of walking shoes). I find these are rarely met by the same pair of shoes, hence my dilemma when packing! I lean in and just add the pairs I both want and need, trying to wear the clunkiest ones on the plane so I can roll aboard, but yes, there is more than one pair on my packing list!
Wearing the chunkiest on the plane is a good idea!
March 11, 2024
I TOTALLY agree!
🤗🤗🤗🤗