Welcome to the fourth installment of my new series! We’re talking about four categories sports, business principles, Christian principles, and today were talking about relationships.
The reason I want to do an entire post on the area of relationships is because I think we are teetering on a crisis! One of our most important human needs is that we are designed for relationships.
I believe we have just gone through the most significant social experiment: Covid 19. The fall out that occurred from the lockdowns and the isolation we experienced during that time will be felt for years and years. Our need for relationship and connection I believe is one of our greatest needs.
I did some research, and these are just a few examples of what the world experienced during the shutdown and the consequences:
Mental Health Challenges
Increased rates of anxiety, depression, and loneliness due to social isolation. Alcohol consumption and drug use rose to an all-time high as people used these as coping mechanisms as they faced uncertainty and fear.
Additionally, being forced to stay in close quarters caused a strain on relationships.
The Education Disruptions
Disruptions in traditional education formats, impacting students’ learning experiences from being taught on screen. I have a very good friend who taught kindergarten. challenges she faced amazing challenges trying to teach 5 year olds on line. They would literally get up, leave the screen and go play. She felt helpless, seeing some of her little students missing out on playing and interacting with each other and missing the nurturing she would normally give her students. Even at these early ages, consequences were felt. Relationships are important!
Digital Fatigue
The increased reliance on digital communication led to “Zoom fatigue” and feelings of disconnection. There are struggles to find a balance between screen time for work, education, and personal interactions. And now, workers office from home.
Social Skills
Limited face-to-face interactions affected the development and maintenance of social skills. It’s still a challenge people are facing, re-adjusting to social settings as all the lockdowns and restrictions were lifted. Even the use of masks broke down the physical interaction of people who could no longer see one another’s facial expressions or even one another’s smile. Where face-to-face relationship has broken down, we have gotten increasingly dependent on interaction online.
While the internet has connected people globally, it has also introduced certain elements that can distance relationships:
Digital Overload
The constant influx of information, notifications, and the pressure to be constantly connected can create a sense of digital overload. This can lead individuals to prioritize online interactions over in-person relationships, potentially distancing us from the immediate social circles that matter most.
Superficial Connections
Social media platforms often encourage a curated and superficial representation of one’s life. This can lead to individuals forming connections based on idealized images rather than authentic, deeper understanding. The result may be a sense of disconnection when real-life experiences don’t match the online portrayal.
Communication Challenges
Digital communication, while efficient, lacks the richness of face-to-face interaction. Misinterpretations of tone, emotional nuances, and body language can occur, leading to misunderstandings. The reliance on text-based communication can sometimes dilute the depth and intimacy of personal connections.
Comparison Culture
The internet exposes individuals to myriad lifestyles and achievements, fostering a culture of constant comparison. This can contribute to feelings of inadequacy, jealousy, or a sense of missing out, potentially straining real-life relationships as individuals grapple with perceived differences.
Reduced Face-to-Face Time
The convenience of digital communication can sometimes replace face-to-face interactions. While video calls can bridge the gap to some extent, they may not fully replace the depth and intimacy of in-person conversations, potentially leading to a sense of emotional distance.
Online Conflict Escalation
Disagreements or conflicts that arise online can escalate quickly due to the absence of physical cues and immediate responses. This can strain relationships as misunderstandings become more challenging to address and resolve.
While the internet has undoubtedly brought people together, it’s crucial to navigate it mindfully to ensure it enhances rather than distances our relationships!
I bring all this up to point out how we are designed for relationship. The breakdown in our society is becoming more and more apparent. We need each other! We need physical face-to-face connection. Recently, I was listening to a podcast that talked about regrets people have when they are on their deathbeds. The podcaster was making a reference to a book he had read recently by an author who was a hospice nurse for many years and wrote a book about times with her patients and the stories of regret as they were approaching death. Their regrets weren’t about lack of success, material things or status. It was about time and relationships.
I experienced this myself when several years ago my sister-in-law, my mom, and my mother-in-law died within 5 months. Those last few weeks with each one of them, the discussions were about relationships and experiences, not about status and stuff! What a lesson, our deep personal relationship are so much more important than counterfeit digital relationships!
How much time do we think about investing our time and attention into our relationships, compared to the obsession of accumulating stuff or status? I get that relationships can be hurtful and messy. But relationships are the fabric of our life. I believe we should pay attention to their importance. Whether it’s family, close friends, and even acquaintances.
There is a popular trend to cut people out of your life that are toxic. It’s even cool to talk about it on the internet. I’m not talking about getting out of abusive relationships, I’m talking about a society that gets offended so easily and doesn’t see the value in working through differences. When we look back at the end of our lives the effort we put into understanding and improving our relationships is going to be one of our most important investments of our time.
Learning better communication skills, learning to forgive and reconnect. These are all important life skills. I also believe being open to adding new people into our lives can be enriching. It starts with getting off our phones and living in our physical world. We need to stop sacrificing our physical relationships for counterfeit digital relationships.
The biggest thing I believe we learned during the Covid shutdown is that we need people; we need relationship. That is why this is one of the top areas I wanted to address on this series.
1. Prioritize open communication to foster understanding and connection.
2. Show appreciation regularly to reinforce positive feelings and strengthen bonds.
3. Be an active listener, demonstrating genuine interest in the other person’s thoughts and feelings.
4. Embrace empathy, putting yourself in their shoes to build compassion and deepen emotional connections.
I hope this has you reflecting on your life right now and how you treat your own close relationships. If one of our most significant needs is love and connection it needs to be a priority in our lives.
Now that I’ve done an overview of these four areas, sports, business principles, Christianity, and personal relationships, my next installment will compare them with each other. We will go into a deep dive of overlapping lessons we can learn from all of them.
I believe you are going to enjoy where we are going with this series. Thanks for joining me!
Monette hosts a weekly podcast: Mornings with Monette. She has been a lifelong learner and and appreciates the opportunity to share what she has learned–both through her podcast and here at The Best-Life Project (based on the content of her weekly podcast). Her messages are raw, honest and straight from the heart. She lives in Albuquerque, NM with her husband Leland. They have three adult children and are enjoying living their best lives filled with travel and adventure.