What Do You Believe? Unveiling the Sacred Covenant of Marriage vs. the Secular Worldview

I’m so glad you are back for the second installment in the series. I’m going to start with the question I asked in the last post: “Why did you get married?” Did you get out that journal and brainstorm answers to this question? This is a question that needs an answer.

In the previous post, I shared a few thoughts regarding how we were raised as little girls. Most of us believed the fairytale that there would be a Prince Charming that we needed to live happily ever after. Or maybe as little girls we just dreamed of being married and being a mom one day. I think, for most of us, we just assumed we would get married one day. I believe God puts this desire in our hearts. I also feel strongly that most of us, once we did get married, realized how big of a decision this really was. And at some point, whether it was a few months or a few years, you probably questioned our decision.

To be honest, it was only a few months for me. (I’ll share in more detail that crazy story in another post.) During this time I was given a book called The Marriage Builder. It is a book that has had the most profound influence on my life. In the 1st paragraph it talks about marriage. The example he gives is that marriage is like two ticks on a dog sucking the life out of the dog. That got my attention. I devoured this book! I think that “tick” statement can be true if you’ve been married a short time or for years.

This brings me to what I think is important: What the worlds model of marriage is and what God’s purpose for marriage is. If you’ve been listening to many of my episodes/reading my posts, you know that I’m a Bible-believing Christian. I believe all the Bible. I have been reading and studying the Bible most of my adult life. I believe “All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness,” (2 Timothy 3:16, NIV). 

I did a deep dive on the topic what is God’s purpose for marriage and What is the Secular World View of Marriage. The Bible provides several passages that speak to God’s purpose of marriage, that marriage is intended by God to be a sacred and lifelong union between one man and one woman. Here are some key verses and principles related to God’s purpose for marriage:

Unity and Permanence

“That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.” Genesis 2:24 (NIV)

Love, Sacrifice, and Mutual Submission

“For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church.” Ephesians 5:31-32 (NIV) In this passage, marriage is described as a reflection of the relationship between Christ and the Church, highlighting the importance of love, sacrifice, and mutual submission in marriage.

Procreation and Family

Throughout the Bible, there is an emphasis on the role of marriage in procreation and the establishment of families. Genesis 1:28 (NIV) states, “God blessed them and said to them, ‘Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it.'”

Companionship and Support

Marriage is seen as a source of companionship and mutual support. In Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 (NIV), it is written, “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.”

Faithfulness and Covenant

The Bible emphasizes the importance of faithfulness and the marital covenant. Malachi 2:16 (NIV) states: “The man who hates and divorces his wife,” says the Lord, the God of Israel, “does violence to the one he should protect,” says the Lord Almighty. “So be on your guard, and do not be unfaithful.”

Love and Self-Sacrifice

In Ephesians 5:25 (NIV), husbands are instructed, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” This verse highlights the self-sacrificial love that should characterize a husband’s relationship with his wife.

Sacred Institution Designed by God

Overall, the Bible portrays marriage as a sacred institution designed by God for the well-being and flourishing of individuals and society. It involves love, mutual support, faithfulness, and the reflection of God’s relationship with His people. These principles are foundational to the understanding of a Christian marriage.

Secular Worldview

In contrast, here is the secular worldview of Marriage: In secular or non-religious worldviews, marriage is often viewed as a social and legal contract between two consenting individuals. It may be seen as a way to formalize a committed partnership and gain legal rights and benefits.

I believe Satan is alive and well. He wants to devour and conquer. I have seen it and felt it throughout my 32 years of marriage. If he can get Christian’s confused so they seek the world’s advice, it is no wonder that so many people choose divorce. Seriously, a formalized committed partnership?

Ultimately, the worldview of marriage is shaped by a combination of cultural, religious, legal, and personal factors, and it continues to evolve over time in response to changing social norms and values. It has no absolutes. We hear it’s ok to have an open marriage, it’s ok to leave when you aren’t in love anymore, etc.

In this series I hope to open your mind. I want you to gather all the facts. My goal is for you to see that marriage is so much more than the Fairytale,  Prince Charming stories, or that the reason to get married is to have kids. Because, if that was you’re “why,” what happens to your marriage when the kids grow up and leave home.

I’ve had all the feelings. I’ve had all the justification to jump ship and leave my marriage. This series on marriage is going to be real and raw. (I’m going to make a disclaimer here, there are reasons a marriage should be dissolved. I am not naive. If there is abuse, I highly recommend you seek professional help and get out. We live in an evil and sinful world. I am not saying all marriages can be saved.) I’m speaking to the person that is either in a tough marriage, a lifeless marriage, or the person wanting to get married.

Please stay with me on this journey. Again, I feel that God put this on my heart to share with you, not because I have a perfect marriage by any stretch of the imagination. I just know that marriage can be incredible, that God is the author of marriage, and He wants us to see this as a gift he has given us and not a life sentence.

Actions Steps

Get out your journal. I want you to write, again, why you got married. I want you to write down how it’s going. Write a 1 if it’s terrible, a 10 if it’s going great and it’s everything you want it to be. I want you to write in this journal what you wish were better. What you really want. All progress starts by telling the truth. And that means being truthful to ourselves. On the next posts in this series I am going to talk about so many different pieces to this puzzle. I hope you stay with me.

If you were thinking of a friend that could use this, share this post with them. If you’ve never written a comment, I would love for you to do that. Remember to do the assignment. Writing things down, getting them out of our heads and on a piece of paper can give us so much clarity. Above all I want you to pray.

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Monette hosts a weekly podcast: Mornings with Monette. She has been a life-long learner and and appreciates the opportunity to share what she has learned–both through her podcast and here at The Best-Life Project (based on the content of her weekly podcast). Her messages are raw, honest and straight from the heart. She lives in Albuquerque, NM with her husband Leland. They have three adult children and are enjoying living their best lives filled with travel and adventure.