Working in the beauty industry for over 30 years taught me many lessons one of which being the Power of Permission.
One day a 75-year-old lady came into the spa for the first time in her life. She had been given a gift certificate from her children for a European facial. She had one hour of pampering, nurturing, peace, stillness and all she could talk about was how she didn’t feel good about just lying there when she should be home working or doing something constructive. She commented that she didn’t understand why her children had given her this when they should have given it to someone else.
Receive the Gift
After years of hearing women talk like this, I had to get up on my soapbox for a woman-to-woman chat. I stopped the facial, went around to the side of the bed so I could look her in the eyes and explain to her what a gift she had been given. Her children were recognizing and honoring her for all the hard work she had done during her lifetime. She was being blessed and yet negating that gift through her words and thoughts of guilt. It was like she was pushing the gift away saying, “No thank you. I don’t deserve it.”
It was at this moment, I realized the “power of permission!”
I called her by name and said, “Sarah, I gave you permission to just set everything aside for a few minutes, clear your mind, think of your blessings, breathe slowly and listen to the water flowing from the fountain and the soft music filling the air.” I then asked her, “Can you do that?”
Don’t Wait!
She replied, “Yes, I can!” After the facial was over, she sat up, turned around to look at me with tears in her eyes and said, “I wish I hadn’t waited so long to do something like this for myself! Thank you for giving me permission to do so.”
Ladies, life is like toilet paper… the closer you get to the end…the faster it goes!
What are you waiting for? There is no better time than the present to take care of you!
Take Care of Yourself
Why is it that sometimes as women, we need permission to do what we want or need to do for ourselves? Somewhere down the line we’ve picked up the notion that if we do so, we are being selfish! It is not selfish to put yourself up at the top of your priority list. It’s like the analogy of the oxygen mask on the airplane. When the flight attendant tells you about the oxygen mask that will come down in case of an emergency, who do they instruct you to put the mask on first? That’s right! You! It is not selfish to put the oxygen mask on yourself first because if you aren’t breathing, you can’t help the person beside you! You cannot give what you don’t have!
Today, I am giving you permission to put yourself up at the top of your priority list, to put the oxygen mask on first and to invest in yourself. Why? The answer is found in the commercial from our past that states, “I use the most expensive hair color in the world, preference by L’Oreal. I don’t mind spending more for L’Oreal because… I’M WORTH IT!”
You have permission to make yourself a priority because…You’re worth it!
Tonya Parker is a motivational speaker and author of the book, Rise Up…Taking Your Life To A Higher Level. She is married with four grown children and loves making memories with her eleven grandchildren. Her 30 years of working in the beauty industry and the Miss USA organization, as well as her service on women’s ministry teams, has given her opportunities to encourage women to become all God created them to be. She is passionate about faith, family, friends, and fun!
You can connect with Tonya at www.tonyaparker.net.
Good article. I still have a hard time being good to myself. I do go get my nails and hair done professionally; BUT, I’ve NEVER had a Spa treatment. However, I purchased a pkg for an Older friend of mine, Tina, who came to visit and Surprised her with it. I took her and told her she deserved this and I’d come back to get her. She was so Surprised and Speechless. When I picked her up 2 hours later – she’d been pampered, nails done, hair done, and felt like a million bucks!
She’s passed away a year ago; but, this article reminded me of it.
Thanks for the memories. 😃🙏
Thanks for the reply Deborah. We just have to remember as women to nurture ourselves right along with the others that we do for in our life. Anything that fills you up is what you should take time to do. It doesn’t have to be a spa treatment or anything that cost money. Taking a bubble bath with candles and pretty music, taking a walk and capturing pictures of nature, or like I did the other day walking barefoot through some cool plush green grass. It made me remember the carefree happy days of childhood and that nourished my soul. I even thought about doing a cartwheel but then quickly remembered I didn’t have time for broke bones! Ha! I’m happy my article let you bask in some sweet memories of your friend. Take care of you!