My mother, Florence Littauer, was hospitalized months before her 90th birthday. We had a big party planned. Ultimately, after several weeks in the hospital, she did recover enough to go home. With round-the-clock care, she grew stronger every day but never came back to her former baseline. We had the birthday party. My sister and I got her dressed, did her hair and make-up, got her to the venue, and seated her on a small stage at the front of the room. Friends and family came from around the country to honor her. She was happy, but ready for bed by 8 o’clock.
Later that evening, after the party, my siblings and spouses gathered for a family meeting. My brother, who managed her finances, told us that we could continue with the care she’d been receiving for a couple more months before we had to start selling things. It was unlikely that she’d ever be able to live on her own again. When my husband and I were alone, he said: “I hate to say this, but I think your mother needs to move in with us.” God bless him! That comment started the wheels turning.
As soon as my mother was well enough to travel, we planned that she’d move to Lubbock with me and Chuck. It was just a matter of weeks because of the kindness of her brother Ron Chapman—a well-known radio personality in the Dallas area. At this point in my mother’s life, her little brother had done very well for himself and was retired. He offered to provide a private jet to transport my mother from her home in Palm Springs, California to Texas. She was accompanied by a caregiver for the trip. I picked them up at the airport. As I was assisting her out of my husband’s truck, she fainted in my arms. She couldn’t have made a commercial airline trip. But due to her brother’s ability to provide for her, she made it!
When I thanked her brother for his generosity, he simply shrugged and said: “It’s something I can do.”
Since that time, I have embraced the it’s-something-I-can-do attitude. I watch for those who need something for which my unique skill set can help.
I loved that idea. I don’t have the financial resources he had. But I do have a wealth of skills, talents, and abilities.
Mom had two really good years in Lubbock. My friends became her friends and we had a lovely 92nd birthday party for her in my home—for which my sister came from California. She died a few months later.
Having spent the past decade of my life as a remodeling contractor, I know that there are solutions to problems that others don’t even know exists.
Here are two recent examples.
Lubbock Women’s Club
I am active in the Lubbock Women’s Club. The club president for this year is petite. When she stands at the lectern, she can barely see over the top. I have a cabinetmaker who I work with. I reached out to him and asked him if he could make a built-in step for the lectern—something that would fold out and be secure and stable. Yes, he’d done something similar for a pastor in the area. He gave me a price. I reached out to my LWC friends and asked each to donate $10 toward the creation of the step. We got it done and installed. When the Club manager thanked me for such a thoughtful gesture, I shrugged and said: “It’s something I can do.” I don’t know how many times it will actually get used, but I saw a need, and I had the resources to make it happen, so I did. It’s something, that with my unique library of experiences, that I could do that most others would never have thought of.
Live Oak Community Church
I go to a growing church. The restrooms were built before we had the size congregation we have now. The ladies room has two toilet spaces that are full rooms with walls and the door going to the ground. This means that you can’t tell if someone is in there or not. Recently, I was using the bathroom, and someone tried to enter only to discover the door was locked. She felt awkward and offered apologies. This was a problem that I could do something about. I went to Amazon and searched for door locks that would show if the room was vacant or occupied. I found them and bought two—one for each door. I brought them to the church and offered to install them—it’s something I can do. The facilities manager was there, and he took care of it. The next Sunday, he told me his wife was thrilled with that small upgrade. I am sure other women were too—though they might not even notice it, it makes everyone more comfortable, less awkward.
I share these two recent examples with you, not so that you think I am anything special, but to give you an idea of watching for a situation where your unique skills, talents, and abilities can be used.
Sister Lauren
My sister, despite being older than I am, is far more technologically savvy. She is often called upon to solve computer issues for her friends. It is something she can do.
Friend Dawn
My friend Dawn and her husband have invested wisely over the years. Now retired, they have sold their rental properties—which have given them assets they can use to help others. Dawn’s husband is foreign-born. As a result, they have a heart to help international students at Texas Tech. Having no children of their own, they welcome these students as their own. They help with housing, food, cars, and even musical instruments. It is something they can do.
Cousin Laurie
My cousin Laurie, a Best-Life contributor, wrote her own tribute to Uncle Ron’s It-is-something-I-can do concept. In it, she shares how her sister has used this idea to bless her: “My husband and I just returned from a week in Florida. We stayed in my sister and brother-in-law’s condominium in Cocoa Beach. As a gift for my retirement from church ministry, they invited us to choose a week to spend in their paradise. We chose a week in early March. Knowing we would be on sandy beaches with warm temperatures got us through our long, gray, Michigan winter. In thanking them profusely for their generosity, their answer, in essence, was: ‘it is something I can do.’ Our joy gave them joy. They used their personal resources for our sake. It is something they didn’t have to do that gave them pleasure.”
What skills, talents, abilities, and/or assets do you have that can help others around you?
My pastor recently taught through 1 John. When addressing 1 John 3:17, he challenged us to ask: “Has my material wealth blessed anyone else?” I believe the verse can be extended beyond material wealth to include our skills, talents, and abilities. As we move into a new year, I challenge you to watch for those who have a need you can fill. Use your resources to bless someone else. It is something you can do.
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Marita Littauer Tedder has spent the majority of her adult life working with women—helping them improve relationships, achieve their speaking and writing dreams, and being the best version of themselves they can possibly be. The author of 20 books, this Living Our Best Life Project is her newest effort—through which she hopes to challenge women to be fulfilled where they are.
I absolutely love this! I feel so incredibly blessed to know most of the people you have written about and to have watched and been blessed by them. Simply bringing me lunch during a difficult week, gifting me with a ticket to a beautiful event, a porch fairy that leaves a bouquet on my doorstep, such beautiful thoughts, because they could. I try, I wish I had more time. It feels so good to give…
Thank you Marita! This article spoke to me, and just like the other sayings that roll around in my head from
Year to year, (“Do the next right thing”, “WWJD,” “Stop, drop, and pray,” etc…) I am adding “What’s something I can do?”
The examples were a great help as well. I remember when my M.I.L. died unexpectedly, the 4 sons were at a loss, but each daughter in law stepped in to help fill her shoes with her special gifts: Sue cooked and gardened, Deb did financial/computer work, Lesley did home beautification, and I managed wardrobing issues (laundry, ironing, shopping)) – we each had something we could do – AND it gave us all a much greater appreciation for what this woman did!
What a great article reminding us to live purposefully and utilize the skills, talents and resources God has blessed us with!
OH Marita, I love this article. My mom is 91 and starting to have issues. She’s in assisted living and they do medical caregiving when she needs it BUT it’s still a huge amount of work for me. Recently, she broke her wrist. Getting her to the doctor is a REAL challenge. Her facility has 2 men who drive their van and help transport the residents. They are the sweetest, kindest, most wonderful men. And she loves them (so does my back and I ). I know they get paid but im sure its not much. I thought to myself “what a fabulous thing to do in the retirement years.” And when I thank them they frequently give a response similar to yours, “its something I can do. I’m glad to help.” Warmly, Laura
Marita you have been so generous as “it’s something I (you)can do, and something I have personally been blessed by.
At my class on Sermon on the Mount, we discussed prayer requests. In discussing our groups prayer requests today, we discussed what each of us can do. Intercessory prayer was very important to each of the group. We have seen God’s hand when we pray over each lady’s request, together, and throughout the week. Best, Jacqueline
Oh Marita! THIS!!!!! Thank you so much. You have provided the “moral reason” why we should alllll recognize “it’s something I can do.” My mom will be 90 this year and has always been the one who is “there” for everyone. We just has this discussion about accepting where we are in life and transitioning into finding “what we can still do” to be active and help others and not be discouraged that we’ve had to relinquish some things we used to do. I will NEVER forget your mom participating in a phone conversation with you and me when you were beginning to revive and update “Wired that Way” and drawing feedback from some former C.L.A.S.S. graduates. Her 91 plus year old mind was amazing and YOU including her, blessed and reminded me to be aware of what honoring wisdom was all about. Thank you again and I know the first thing I am going to do to help and organization right now…..!
Marita,
Thank you for sharing these words. I often need to be reminded of my blessings and find ways to bless those around me. This article was inspiring and brings me back to where I need to be in life serving others and less focus on self!
I like that the article points us to focus on what we can do each day and look for opportunities to show our Christian love.
Blessings!
Melody